Make The Sun Shine
by kkuka
Summary: Sequel to "Instantly". Make sure you read that before you read this otherwise it won't make sense.  I do not own Glee or it's characters, I only own my writing.
1. Chapter 1

Dear Beth,

Hello my sweet girl. I've been missing you every minute of every day since the accident. I don't remember much of it, but the moment I found out you were gone, my began to crumble into tiny pieces. However, the piece that contained you stayed intact because you will never fall. You'll always be here, somehow or someway as long as you're in my heart.

Things have changed since you've been gone. Your dad began writing music a lot. Most of the songs are about you. About us. About our family. I can see the pain in his eyes as he writes. He misses you so much, Beth. If you could see him now, you'd run up and hug him. That simple little hug would make him the happiest man on Earth.

I had a dream about you last night, which was what motivated me to write this to you this afternoon. You were dancing in the flowers in the meadow behind our house, like you used to when you were three. You looked so radiant, my sweet little girl. Your golden hair shone like a star in the sunshine. I miss brushing it before bedtime, like we used to. I could make a list of one million things I miss about you, darling. Writing them all down would be the hard part, but you know I'd do anything for you. I miss the bright smile you wore every day, because it made me proud to be the mother of such a positive little girl. Even through your pain, you'd smile. I'm so honored to call you my daughter.

Today, the rain is hitting the window in your room in which I am writing this to you. It's been raining for almost a week straight. I wonder what you're doing up there, above those clouds that pour rain down on us. I often wonder what you're doing. Both your dad and I do. We talk about you all the time, reminiscing about all the best times we got to share in those short eleven years. We often think back to the night the power went out when you were eight. You got so scared, so your dad lit what seemed like a million candles all around the house, built a fire in the fireplace and told us a story about how the power only goes about because all the spirits stole it all to have a party up in the sky. You laughed. I can still hear it. So infectious and beautiful.

Oh Beth, I just miss you. I miss hugging you, kissing you goodnight. I miss taking you to school, picking flowers in the meadow, just hanging out. I know I can't bring you back, but if I could, I would in a second. There is nothing more I would want. Some days feel unbearable. I can barely make it out of bed and I just want to cry and hug you. Then I feel you around me, pushing me with your positive energy, telling me to be strong for you. I feel you all around me and I know you're happy.

When the sun shines, I know it's because you're smiling or laughing. Maybe you're playing cards with grandpa Puckerman, or chasing around our kitten. On those days, I feel like I can talk to you and that you can hear me. Maybe you can, I'll never really know. But all I can do is hope.

I better go, Beth. Your new baby sister is crying. Maybe she's crying for you. I promise I'll write again tomorrow, but until then, take care and smile for me, darling. Let the sun shine again.

I love you with all the love in the world, my darling daughter.

Infinite x's and o's,

Mom.

Quinn put down the pen and looked out the window with a sigh. A tear streaked down her cheek.

As she finished folding the note, she ran her hand over her words and placed a kiss upon it.

Outside she went, in the pouring rain. She wandered into the meadow. In her right hand was a ribbon, which on the end a pink balloon was sitting. In the left, the note. With a bow, she tied the note to the string of the balloon.

"Make the sunshine, my girl," she whispered into the rain. "I miss you." And she let it go, watching it float into the clouds.


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Beth,

Hello again, my sweet girl.

I want you to know, the day you were born was the best day of my life. The past eleven years were the best eleven years of my life. But the day you died, was the worst day. I know I wasn't awake but if I was, I know my heart would've been torn out of me, slowly and painfully by every vessel. One by one.

Every time I think about the moment you drifted off, it breaks my heart. If I could've just been awake to hold your hand. It kills me every day. And then I wonder, why was it you who had to die, not me? I lived longer, had a fuller life than you. You had so much ahead of you, and you'll never get to fulfill your goals and dreams and desires. Just please know, my angel, that you could've done whatever you wanted and you would've succeeded. I know it. Moms know these things.

The leaves are changing colors now. Beautiful greens, are fading into golden yellows and oranges. The autumn colors are beautiful, but I wish the green would just stay. It reminds me of your bright, beautiful eyes.

I wish we could walk through the leaves together, hear them crunching beneath our feet again, like we used to. With every step I take with your dad and little sister, I long for you to be there with us. We're a family, but a broken one without you. With every crunch, I hear your soft little laugh in the cold autumn wind. It's the most beautiful sound.

I just miss you.

I have to go, though, darling. You know I'll write again soon.

Love you forever and always,

Mom.

Silently, Quinn folds the letter and tucks it delicately into an envelope. She ties it to a pink balloon and lets it fly into the clouds once more, quietly hoping for a reply she'll never get.


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Beth,

I'm sitting beside you now. Well, beside your gravestone. I guess it's kind of like you… kind of. It's only my third time here since the accident. I know it's not a lot, but I can't handle it, you see. It scares me, it upsets me, and it angers me. I know it shouldn't because I'm near you, but it does. It's not you. It's the fact that you're so close, yet I can't see you. You lay underground. You don't move or speak or breathe anymore. Your eyes are closed; your arms lay gingerly across your chest. You're still. I can't help but remember you like that, when I should remember you jumping in piles of leaves or running through the grass and flowers in the meadow. You know, doing what you loved.

You didn't have enough time to figure out what else you loved to do.

Sitting here beside you right now makes you _feel here._ I don't know if that sounds ridiculous or stupid, but it makes sense to me. I don't know how else to explain it. It's like you're in the wind, in the grass, in the flowers. You're everywhere. It's calming me.

Today, before I left to come here, your sister asked me where I was going. I told her, in the easiest way for a one and a half year old to understand, that I was going to see her big sister. She looked at me with a confused smile on her face. I told her that maybe she could meet you one day soon. She smiled the biggest smile I'd ever seen a little girl smile. She'll love you, Beth. Even if she can't see you, she'll love you. I know it.

Your dad comes and visits you more often than I do, but I'm sure you already know that. He brought you all these beautiful flowers sitting around me right now. He always told me that a beautiful girl deserves flowers to match. I don't think he likes to show it, but he misses you. So, so much. He tries to be strong for me, I can tell. Sometimes he'll get quiet and I that's how I know he's thinking about you and he's crying inside. It's hard for him, I think. You were his pride and glory, his little girl. When you were happy, he was too. When you were sad, he felt a lump in his throat as well. No one will ever take your place in his heart, or mine.

You know I'd like to lay here forever with you, but your dad and sister need me so I better get going home. I wish you could talk to me again. I wish it more than anything. If I could have just one more minute with anyone, it would be you. You were my whole world, my girl. I hope you know that. Say hi to grandpa Puckerman for me and your dad. We miss him.

Talk to you soon,

Mom.

For the third time, Quinn tied the letter to the balloon and sent it floating into the air. She stood on the ground, looking up at the sky as it danced its way into the clouds with the wind.

"I'll love you forever and ever, my girl," she whispered into the wind, sending a kiss escalating into the clouds with the balloon.


End file.
